claire

a disclosure

My God is in no hurry

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"I may be in a hurry to complete my research, but my God is in no hurry to mold me."

The 'never thought of' words that came right out of my mouth while I was leading the church service this morning.

I came to IITG last December, in a hope to complete my unfinished experiments within six months. But then, things aren't easy as it seems. Going to lab everyday, which sometimes include Sundays, doesn't really pay off, for now. Three of my batch-mates in Mizoram University have already submitted their thesis within four years, and one will be having a pre-submission soon. And I'm still stuck out here, trying all kinds of protocol in developing a Transgenic plant. I'm not getting the expected results and things are getting stressful, and tensions are high. Sometimes I just want to give up and go home. Mom is sick, she needs me. My aunt and uncle needs to be taken care of, Dad is getting old, he'll be eighty in another six years and I feel responsible to be there for them.

Then God spoke to me one night, through His words while we were having our daily prayer meeting in the hostel. Habakkuk 3:17-19


Yes, with just these three verses, my perspective changed and my optimism rebuilt itself. I look back the life spent here, and there never was a day that I regret. 

When I came here for the first time, I didn't know any one. I met my first friend Onisha on day one. She willingly allowed me to stay in her room since it took time to get a room of my own. We stayed together for about a month. She happened to be a Christian, and I started joining their prayer group. We meet every night to pray, and on every Tuesday night, we have a Bible study with Madam Josephine (one of the Professors' wife in IIT). Frankly, in the beginning, I wasn't much into these meetings. All I wanted was to complete my research and leave. But then, God has other plans for me, which I now realize. I have been so blessed with all the prayer meetings and the bible studies. And I have also learned so much from the church I attend, which is Saraighat Community Church (SCC). All the gatherings and sermons and worships have spoken to me one way or the other and I can slowly feel a change in me. If you must be wondering, we do have a Mizo Church, which is one and half hour away from the campus, and it includes morning Sunday schools, afternoon Sermon and evening Youth gathering (KTP). Since I sometimes have lab-work on Sundays, I hardly go there. Well, to me, every church is free for Christians, after all we worship the same God.

And so, I was mentioning about me leading the church service this morning. This is a true testimony for the change in me that I have been talking about. My friends at home will know how much I stammer and shake, when I stand in front of people. My voice trembles and I go tongue tight. But leading the church today, which is by the way, my second time to lead in SCC, I had that inner confidence. I could speak out the things I wanted to say, and everything went so smooth. 

I am in my fourth year of research, but my labmates here are in their fifth and sixth years. The amount of work they do is definitely incomparable to the amount of work we do in my University. The standards are too different. And so, I say to myself, I will have at least a thesis which will be close to their standard, and by the time I have my results, I hope to be a better person, professionally and spiritually. God has placed me here for a purpose and He has written my life way before I was born. He will take care of my family, I need not worry.

So, I gladly say again

"I may be in a hurry to complete my research, but my God is in no hurry to mold me."












My Happily Ever After

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And they lived happily ever after... Sigh! Growing up with fairy tales like Cinderella, Rapunzel and Snow White.. we always want that Prince charming to come rescue us some day, so that we can live happily ever after. The difference between fairy tales and reality lies on the idea of "Happily ever after". In this post, I want to share my idea.

Happiness is not when you get introduced to a random guy who earn lots of money. For as long as I can remember, family and friends have been talking to me about when I should get married and to whom. And the conversation always starts with "Why don't you like that guy, he's a Doctor, give him a chance", or "Why not this guy? He's an Officer" or "That person, he's an assistant Professor". Come'on !! Give me a break! I know this all comes from the heart, and you want a stable future for me, and want me to be "happy", but will I be happy if that Doctor/Officer cheats on me every time? I got in touch with my long lost friend few days ago, and she excitedly asked me "Do you have a boyfriend? Someone wants to know, and he's an Officer". I could have answered her straight away, but when she added "He's an Officer", it kinda made me want to ignore the question. She said "He really likes you." But after coming to know his name, he was the guy who had hit on my friend some few months back, and she didn't like him (haha). Its a small world, too bad. And I don't believe that he really did like me, he's just one of those guys setting a trap all around, so that if one girl refuses him, he'd go to the next. Uff! Guys these days!

My idea of Happily Ever After, is this..


When I was in Chennai, we used to attend the church service which was pretty far from where we stayed. So we would just take an Autorickshaw, after wasting 5 minutes of bargaining. And one day, after church, while we were raising our hands to catch a rickshaw, a scene caught my eye. It was the Pastor's family. Him, his wife and their two small kids hurriedly rushed into a city bus, and they did not even get a seat, they were standing and laughing, happy to be able to catch the bus in time.

I said to myself  "That is what I want". What do I want? I want to be simple and happy. I don't want fancy cars and branded clothes. I want love and honesty. I want compatibility. I want laughter and joy. I want a trusting relationship.

Last Sunday, a couple presented a song, the husband played the guitar and called his wife up, and asked her to pick any song she wants. It was one of the most beautiful presentation I've ever seen. No they did not put on any costume, nor did they practice the song before. They have a normal good voice. But what made me almost shed a tear, was the happiness I saw shining between them.

And I said to myself again "That is what I want". What do I want? I want a happy married life. I want to praise God with my hubby. This doesn't mean he has to know how to play guitar or know how to sing. It simply means, that we should be in harmony so that we can serve the Lord in any way we can. Be it singing, or distributing Bible verses, or attending church together.

People these days, have been so distracted with money and high living, that they tend to forget the real source of happiness. "Money doesn't buy you happiness", we all know and we should remind ourselves more often. So please don't come and try to introduce me to a guy earning millions. God has planned one for me, and He will let me know, at the right time.

After-all, I want to live my Happily Ever After :-)








The only one

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Since birth, I have been so accustomed to having "The only" title, be it in the family or in college. I was born being the only daughter to my parents and the only sister to my brothers, and so, the only girl in the family, until 10 years back, I lost that only girl title when my first niece was born. She somehow occupied my place. But then, I became the only aunt to my nieces and nephew. 

I entered college and I became the only Mizo and the only Christian in my class, and I guess this is going to last as far as my academic life is concerned. I have to mingle with my non-Mizo friends, where I have to be with them trying to understand what they are talking about while they converse in Kannada, Tamil, and now Hindi, and there are many times I go "Duh" because if they forget to explain things to me in English, I lose track of whats happening around me. 

Well, coming to the point, having "the only" title isn't easy. Your responsibility becomes big.
For instance, had I not been the only daughter and sister to my family, I would have married a guy of my choice 10 years ago and lived happily ever after (hehe). On a serious note, the expectations that comes from the family becomes high, and its tough trying to fulfill them sometimes. 

And then being the only Mizo is one big reputation I have to keep. If I do anything wrong or right, people will assume "Oh, thats what Mizos' do". Few days back, my lab-mates showed me a picture uploaded on facebook of Mizo guys killing and roasting a dog, blood spilled all over, with comments like "How can they do this to dogs?" "So cruel" and they asked me "Do you also eat dog meat?" I have to stand there defending my own, telling them that I don't eat dog meat, and its only some of the people, not all of us. As a matter of fact, a picture of any animal, being slaughtered isn't a pretty sight to see. I was there to tell them about it, so that they don't get wrong ideas of my people. But yeah, my ancestors were head hunters, which means we can be mean if we want to, so beware though (:P) 

Being the only Christian (in lab/class), I have to be extra careful in everything I do. "Practicing what you preach" becomes a priority, when you stay among non-believers. Things which may seem a minor issue to some people, like returning that extra 10rs when the salesman makes a mistake in giving you your change, or paying that 2rs (only) balance you owed to the tea stall guy yesterday, becomes means of showing who you are and what you learn from the Bible. You have to keep in mind that, people are watching, and you have to be on guard. And you can actually preach the gospel with your deeds.

Uncle Ben said (In Spider -Man), "With great power comes great responsibility"
Mimi says (In her blog) - "Being the only one brings in great responsibility" :D

Report on 12w challenge - the graph is horizontal :-)

 Here's sharing Adele's "One and only" (not much related to the post though)


The Honest Wedding

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I've had a very sleepless night. I went to bed at 3, and I woke up every hour with all kinds of thoughts running in my head. Then, I got a text from one of my very very close friend in the morning, she's getting married!! Yay. She mentioned very clearly that it is going to be a 2nd degree wedding, not because she's pregnant, and not because they've eloped. She said "We did something that God didn't allow". I replied right away, "I'm so proud of your honesty". I tried to go back to sleep, but I couldn't. With the very active mind that had been thinking all night, my thoughts continued to wander on the hottest topic a girl always like to talk about - Weddings. 

Kate Hudson, one of my fav actress, from the movie Bride Wars
According to my church, couples who had slept together before marriage, cannot get married in church. They have to choose some place else. And I remember when we were small, the brides were not even allowed to wear a white dress, they are not allowed to have a white wedding, 'White' which stands for 'Purity' I guess. One of my cousins wore a yellow gown (:D).

So it has become every girl's dream  every Mizo girl's dream to have a White wedding, to get married in a church wearing a beautiful dress. This has been an influence from the Western culture. We have been influenced so much with the Western world that, some of us take sex so casually, which creates a clash between a girl's dream of white wedding and the rule of not allowing to have one, if you had slept with your hubby-to-be. The thing with Western people is that, they do all these stuffs, but finally when they've made their choice of marriage, they still get to have a white wedding, which is not possible for us. Now, that's when the test of honesty comes. 

Some couples cannot hide their little secret, because the girl becomes pregnant, I'm not going to talk about them. And I don't want to talk about the couples who got married with a secret and still get to have a White wedding, because whats done is done, they've made their choices. What I do want to talk about is, the couples who are yet to get married. With us being Christians, and many of us having titles in church and society, we tend to hide what has happened, afraid to stand up and confess our mistakes. And I've seen lovers breaking their relationship, just because they've done the un-permitted, and since they cannot reveal the truth to their parents and especially to the church, they choose to break up after all the "I love you's" and the "I want to live with you forever". Really? Tell me, where is the love??

Once, there were two lovers, and the girl got pregnant. She confessed before God, but the guy did not want to accept the child. He is the son of a church elder. He had asked her to undergo abortion, but she didn't. She had a son, on her own, and their son has all the features of his dad. The dad got married after many years to another girl, a white wedding of course, but till today, the wife cannot conceive. I'm not going to preach about what people should do, but we should all know, we have a creator up there, from whom we cannot hide, He sees us, and some day, one way or the other, He is going to act according to our behavior.

I don't want this post to be an encouragement to the young boys and girls to sleep with anyone they want. Get married a virgin. That's the best and that's what God wants. But to those who don't qualify to this, you should know it's not the end of the world. We are human, we make mistakes, we get cheated with our emotions. Nobody's perfect. With all the wrong paths that you have walked upon, you can make an U-turn and start walking the right path. Just be honest to God and He will forgive you. Forget about the glamorous white wedding and the titles you have in church, forget about the people who will talk about you because you had made a mistake. Like my friend here, she said her mom's really hurt, and she's going to be more ashamed when the church restricts her from attending important services for some months, after they get informed (Its a must that one should inform the church). I wish the best for them, and I'm 100 percent sure, that God will bless them for their honesty. And though I haven't met her fiance, I can tell that he's very bold and I'm happy my friend is marrying him. I wonder how many guys out there are as bold as him, a guy who isn't afraid to stand up for the truth. We say we hate corruptions, we hate lies, I wonder how many of us are planning to start a family with a lie.

Be brave, be honest. Let your dreams of having a white wedding be flexible, if its going to cost you your honesty. Aim for the more respected "Honest wedding".







Of death

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Of all the things we hear in our busy lives, death is something which always makes us pause and it takes that part of your thought away, for a moment, to quietly grief for the loss of a precious life. When you hear of someone's demise, it grabs you at the core of your heart. It could be someone you know, or a relative of a known person, or could be a tragic accident, like MST bus accident or the Twin tower attack, where that many people died, and you still grief for them, even if they are people you haven't met. If its someone you know, you start to think of the loved ones they've left behind, the life they led, you try to remember the last time you saw them or the last time you spoke. It could be a year back, or yesterday, or just today.

Mom called me up today, to break a shocking news. "U Mazualtei passed away this morning". "How is that possible?" I asked, she's just 40 and I didn't even know she was sick. Mom continued "She has been hospitalized and was in the ICU for some time, she died of brain TB". My heart broke. The first question that pops out in my mind was "Why her?". She's my cousin's wife, my cousin who had died of brain tumor few years back. And they have two kids, just teenagers, just so young. The thought of them growing up without parents pierced me. They are still too small, still too fragile. The news made me think about so many things, about life and how unpredictable we are.

I take a look at myself. God gave me parents till today, and yet I find reasons not to be content. Then I think of them, the many times they will question 'Why' to people, to God, and the very thought of them not receiving a satisfying answer breaks my heart more. The only answer would probably be "Only God knows why". They will watch their friends grow up with parents, there will be a day they see others wishing their own on Father's day and Mother's day, and they will question "Where is mine?" A day they will get into fights in schools and colleges, and doubts in their love lives, they will need some one to be on their side. I am asking the same thing they'd be asking, "God, Is it not enough that you've taken their father? Why the mother too?!" Even though they've got us aunts and uncles all over, we will never be able to replace their parent's place. Life is so unfair some times, but God knows what He's doing. Its just so hard to understand His plans.

I remember when my uncle (mom's bro) passed away a long time ago, niece and blogger Amelia was still in her diapers, 2 years old I think. After the funeral, the little one was staring at the sky for a long time, and finally shouted "A pu Hu" (Grandpa). That made uncle's wife very happy, she felt assured that he has gone to heaven and it was one of the things she spoke most about later in life. So the brighter side is, this place is just temporary and we will all go to reunite in heaven one day.

Some people die with long term diseases, and some lives are taken at the blink of an eye. The fact is, we are all going to die one day, with or without sickness. Where will you go after that? That depends on you, and how you've lived your life. The other question is, have you told someone how you feel about them? Have you shown your love to some one? I've realized lately, that talking about how good a person was, after they have gone doesn't really make sense. We should be able to tell them when they are alive. Telling some one how happy you are to have them in your life, "face to face" is something very difficult for me. But thanks to technology, I can at least tell my parents or brothers how much I love them by typing it out. 3rd Oct was my 2nd brother's birthday, I wished him and he replied "Good to have a great sis", something he wouldn't have told face to face, and it made me glad to know how he feels. Life is too short to hold your feelings. Let it out before its too late.

Leaving you with one of my favorite song - Temporary home by Carrie Underwood.

This is my temporary home, it's not where I belong
Windows and rooms that I'm passing through
This is just a stop on the way to where I'm going
I'm not afraid because I know
This is my temporary home








Mom's 65th birthday

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Happy Birthday Mom! 
Me and Mom on my 3rd Brother's wedding, March 2012 (She is wearing a wig due to her chemo treatment)

She has turned 65 and I am overwhelmed with joy right now. We spoke for half an hour, and I'm just so happy to hear her laughter over the other end of the line. She had so much to say. Our conversation wouldn't have ended if cousin Maremi had not paid a visit to wish her. But I can call her up again, maybe some time in the night.

Looking back at my older posts, I noticed I have mentioned mom in most of my updates, and I have four posts dedicated especially for her (click on links to read the post)

4) SHE

Growing up with some one like my mom, was no doubt quite difficult some times. Because she is organized, disciplined, strict and stern, and very very hardworking. She's the kind of person who cannot simply sit and allow the spider to weave its cobwebs. The kind of person who just doesn't sleep during the day, because of a previous sleepless night. The kind who scolds you when she's mad, but then she doesn't hold grudges on any one.The kind of person who arranges the closet with neatly folded clothes, and who arranges her money to face the exact same side inside her purse (I've inherited this from her). 

People who are lazy and carefree don't usually enter mom's good book. And I'm one of them (:D). Teenage years was the hardest. That time your on the phone with a friend for about an hour, and she comes and tells you to hang up. And that time when a friend is celebrating a birthday, and she tells you to get home before dark. That time you didn't go home before dark, and she starts calling every house of your friends and startle their parents. That time when you're having a good time at a friend's place, the phone rings, and every one guesses "It's probably Mimi's Mom". That embarrassing time your guy friend (having pierced ears) visits you, and she asks "Whose son are you?" with THAT look on her face. That time when every girl was wearing dresses designed in the latest fashion, but she designs yours for you, and you have to wear it without complaining. You can complain, but the thing is, the design remains the same (hehe).

I wanted a sister so much back then, so that we can at least share our worries. As I slowly start growing, I've come to realize that mom is the only best friend I'll ever have. She'll tell me things to do, scold me when I go wrong, after all, she's my mom, and its her job. Mom got married at an early age, and she did not complete her matriculation (Early marriage was a tradition back then I guess). When I passed my Class 10 board exam, she prayed with tears of joy during our family prayer. I won't forget that prayer. She used to say, "I may not have completed my matric exam, but according to my kids, I have passed six times!". Yes, mom was always there for us. She would stay awake as long as we study, prepare maggi or egg for us, sometimes milk with honey. Till middle school, she would sit with me while studying, and prepare questions so that I could self-test myself after every chapter.

I did not get her a gift this time. Last year I managed to give her a touchscreen phone, and you know, mom catches up so fast, she can use her touchscreen phone, send sms and make calls at the age beyond 60. Amazing right? That's my Mom, and I'm proud of her :-) This year, I'm broke (:D). Maybe I'll call her again, and again. After all, gift is not what that matters, its the love we have and the way we show it to some one, that really matters. I'm just so thankful to God, for giving me a Mom like her.

(A little update on the 12w challenge)

Progress? No :P
But I'm hanging on, I'm trying. I'll try harder, as a birthday gift for mom :-)

Good day Y'all !!














Exam - The 12 Week Challenge

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Last night, I was thinking whether I'd be able to go home this winter. While every one was heading towards home for the holidays last year, I was heading away leaving behind a new unworn pair of boots that I've ordered from NEXT. I had to spend the most awaited days of my life - Christmas, My birthday and New year away from home. I can't predict my stay here in IITG, either my boss will extend my stay, or he might tell me to pack my stuffs in October (Its a three months extension basis). Whatever it may be, I have to be here on 23rd December, to write an exam. So either if I stay here, or if I come from home, I will be needing a flight ticket to home before Christmas. I was just browsing through Make my trip site, then I saw a cheap ticket, I bought it without any second thoughts, with all the money I've got in my bank account. But I still can't be sure whether I'll be able to make this trip, its all in God's hands, I should leave it according to His will. 

Ever since I've Post graduated, me and my friends have been applying for the National Eligibility Test (NET), in which we always fail to succeed. My best friend in Chennai once told me "Mimi, I think its a waste. It's like I'm donating 800rs (400 June exam + 400 Dec exam) every year to CSIR". She's from general class, so she had to pay 400rs for applying while we, from the Scheduled Tribe have to pay 100rs.

There are many reasons why we can't clear this exam. Our subject comes under Life Science, and the exam is conducted jointly by Council of Scientific & Industrial Research (CSIR) and University Grants Commission (UGC) . Its not like those other subjects which has been conducted solely by the UGC, and we do not have an exam center in Mizoram. The nearest centers are either Imphal, Guwahati or Kolkata. So we get a little sad when every once in a while, someone updates their fb status "I've cleared NET", and our relatives asks, "How about you?". Its annoying to explain every time, "Their NET and our NET isn't the same!" Unlike the exams conducted by the UGC, there is a 25% negative marking for each wrong answer, and the question itself is very very tricky.

Ok, keeping the excuses aside, whether we like it or not, we have to give this exam. There's no point in wailing about it. And frankly, we don't study, and surely we don't deserve to clear it without studying. Most times I did not attempt the exam, coz I had to travel, and I thought it was a waste of time and money to attempt an exam which I didn't study for. 

I called up Mom this morning, to tell her about the ticket that I've bought for December. She was happy about it. She said she has been having a dedicated prayer exclusively for me these days, and as a matter of fact she was just about to pray when I called her. She wants me to clear this exam. It has been dragging for so long. And truth be told, I'm not a very bright person, I succeed only when I study and work for something. In my B.Sc years, I got 98% in Botany and with it, I broke the record in University of Mysore, and every one thought I was so bright and smart. Well, they did not know how much I studied. I want to be that person again. Someone who works hard, and achieves a fruit out of it.

I turned the pages of the NET syllabus today, click HERE in case your interested to know about it. There are, in short, 13 units, and I have exactly 12 weeks and few days left to face the exam. The 13 units itself has been divided into so many parts, and its a combination of Botany, Zoology, Immunology, Microbiology, Human Genetics etc. I have to get my lazy brain to work. And so I plan to update my progress every week here in my blog, so that I can keep myself disciplined. This little project is going to be tough I know, and my research/lab work will go on in between. But I gotta do what I gotta do! So even if I can't clear the test, I can at least be content about it and say that "I've tried".

To my blog readers - I need your prayers and support, I will keep you updated every week. To mom - please keep praying for me, I will try my best to achieve what you wanted. To that sweet guy who might want some time with me - I will not be available much, and I can't stop you from not talking to other girls. But I promise, once I get done with this test, and if your'e still interested, I can make you a hot cup of coffee or hot chocolate, on a cold winters' night, and we can cuddle up and watch a movie next to our fireplace :-) To Social Networking - I will not try to hibernate from you, because seriously, you have been a part of me since my B.Sc days, and you never were a reason that I don't do well in anything. I hate it when people think its Facebook that controls you. You should control it, don't let it control you. Wish me luck guys.

*NERD MODE ON* 







Have you met Mimi Hrahsel?

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If not, you should. She's beautiful, intelligent and smart. A down to earth kind of girl. She's an awesome writer, she's good with words. You should visit her blog. If you want to be her man, you have to be good to her. She takes relationships seriously. She likes it when it rains. She grew up falling in love with MLTR songs. She loves to try out different kinds of food, and she loves to travel. The best thing I like about her, is that she's a true Mizo girl. She'll stand up for who she is. If she finds out any Mizo name written wrongly in national newspapers, or any false rumors about the clan, she will write thousands of complaints if she has to. She is friends with Makima, Chhama and Casey.

Yes, here she is... *drum roll*  The lovely Mimi Hrahsel!


Oh wait, there's two of them. Which one am I talking about?

Gotcha! I bet you were thinking - "Why is this girl bragging about herself?". Were you? hmm? hmmm? hmmmmmm? :P

Anyways, I'm going to write about a girl whom I've come to know in the online world, due to our names being similar. Mimi (the pretty one in black jacket) and me, we were often tagged wrongly in Facebook photos (Facebook did not show thumbnails that time while tagging, it was just names). We have lots of friends in common. So whenever someone uploads her picture, they would tag me. I think it was vice versa too, right Mim? And there are fans like Amos who would enjoy the similarities of our names, and he would be hyper-excited if we both comment on his posts. Sometimes he would comment "Will the real Mimi Hrahsel please stand up?", or sometimes "Ka thi dawn! Mimi Hrahsel leh Mimi Hrahsel in an lo comment!". Hehe, Dear Amos, we pronounce you our number one fan :D. We had our mutual friends confused many times. And some of them would beg, "One of you please change your name!". For some time, due to the much begging and pleading, I changed my fb name to 'Meme Hrahsel', then everyone started to call me 'Me Me' (Me pronounced as in Ma-nicure). I got fed up, so I changed back to Mimi, this time both M's in big letters - MiMi Hrahsel :-)

Frankly, in the beginning, I got a little irritated. I was thinking "Who is this girl, why can't she just change her name, and she's friends with my friends too?!" I think I've ignored few friend requests because her friends and cousins thought I was her. (Sorry Mims). Later, we added each other as friends. Then, I came to learn the so many similarities we have. "She's cool, she's really cool" was my second opinion and my forever will be - opinion about her (unless she plans to steal my boyfriend or something :P). Now, every once in a while, I get emails which was meant for her, or requests on Instagram, I'd forward/inform about it to her with a smile. I guess I'm getting used to it.

Keeping aside the similarities, I think she's the smarter and hotter version of me. Unlike me, she's good in fashion. She dresses way cooler than me. A graduate from IIMB, she's working at ZOVI right now. Independent and intelligent. One among the Mizo girls that I respect.

So, after many wrong taggings and comments, we finally got to meet while I was attending a conference at IISc, Bangalore in November 2010. I can't tell who was more excited, us or our friends (haha). We had a good time at 'Kyra - The restaurant' where a Mizo band Boomarang was performing. Too bad I couldn't stay for long since I had to catch a night bus going to Chennai, and Makima had to pay 400Rs for eating peanuts only (wahahahaha). But it was worth a visit. If I were to stay in Bangalore, I'm sure they would be the circle of friends I'd end up with.

Finding out and getting to know people having a name like yours, ain't that bad at all :-)

PS: Visit Mimi's blog at mimiehrahsel.blogspot.com. You'll see how good a writer she is.











Unlike most girls

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This morning, I was on my way to lab, as usual with my iPod in the pocket. But I noticed that it got stuck, and so I was music-less for 20 mins. Luckily it was slightly drizzling, and the weather was perfect. So my walk to the lab was not lengthening (without music) as I supposed it would be. I enjoyed the drizzle and the breeze. This iPod is special, because it was a birthday gift from Prissy in year 2008, and at the back its inscribed "Live it out Mim. Love, Kim". Its something I couldn't afford otherwise, so it becomes a treasure. As soon as I reached the lab, I told Adree about it, and I googled on how I should get it fixed. I had the answer at one go, "Press the middle button and the menu button for 5 to 15 seconds, and an Apple logo will appear". I followed the instructions and it worked. I was relieved. Adree asked me how I googled. I told her that I have just typed "Ipod hang". She said, "Mimi, you have a boy's mind. If I were you, I would have typed - My ipod got hanged, what shall I do?". We laughed.

When I was small, I hardly wore skirts. Well, growing up with five big brothers, I was much more comfortable with pants. I didn't even know how to sit while wearing a skirt. I remember in one of my Sunday school photos, we were in Beginner's department, all the girls sat nicely, covering whatever they had to cover, while I was sitting with all my panty showing. Gee! What an embarrassment :-) The other day, on our Meeting with Aduhi, and my sample collection (mentioned in the previous post), there was a bomb scare just outside where we had dinner and all the traffic was halted. Brother 2 was the one who had sent those samples. So he asked me if I have received my stuffs or not. I told him we went there, and there was a bomb scare. He replied "What if ur bombed? Ud survive. Coz ur bullet/bomb proof since childhood!" 

 I guess Adree's right. I may have a boy's mind. Because the other day, I saw a photo shared on 9gag about 'boy vs girl's desktop'. My desktop is quite neat, and my bed is always made. So I was thinking, maybe I'm in between :D (jk). But when I've come to think of it, I'm not like most girls, and it has its pros and cons.

Unlike most girls (pros): 
I'm not afraid of the dark. And I'm not afraid of insects or snakes or lizards or frogs. I can carry my own luggage without asking someone's help. I'd go twice or thrice back and forth if I have to. I'm not afraid to stay in the lab up to 12am on my own. My lab-mates would be worried sometimes, if my work gets prolonged. I know there are securities inside the campus, so I feel that I'm quite safe, while some of my girl-friends would need company if they were to stay late. I can change gas cylinders when it gets emptied while cooking, provided the full cylinder should have a trolley. And I can carry empty gas cylinders from my house to the distributing point, which may be about 50 paces (:D). I'm not afraid of syringe and injections. I can swallow medicines ever since childhood. I can travel alone (train/bus/plane), and I remember staying up all night alone in Kolkata airport because I did not get room to stay (This, I guess some girls can do too, but, just mentioning!). When I was small, I used to get sick while traveling by road. So we would just hang a carry bag on my neck, and I'd just puke whenever I felt like it without disturbing the others. Cool eh? :P 

Unlike most girls (cons):
Cleaning rice - Buh thlei
I cannot arrange flowers even though I admire them. I cannot sew dresses and clothes (I can put buttons :D). Mom and dad are both experts in stitching and tailoring stuffs, and their daughter is zero at it (hihi). I don't know which color eye-shadow would match my eyes, or in which pattern I should apply. I don't know which lipstick color would match my lips. I don't know dress designs, I wear whatever my tailor stitches for me. I'm not interested in the trending fashion. I don't know how to fix my hair, leave it straight or tie it up. On occasions, curl it. That's all I got. I have just one color nail-polish. Mocha express from Revlon. I feel uneasy using colors like bright red, or blue or black, but I love it when its used by other girls. Due to my allergy/sinusitis, I cannot clean the rice in our traditional way of "Buh thlei". I guess, of all the cons mentioned, buh thlei may be one of the things I want to learn most, but my sneezing nose and watery eyes just wouldn't let me. I'd sit with mom whenever she brings out rice to clean, then I'd end up lying in bed with a running nose. So I gave up trying. 

To all the girls who can do all these things that I cannot do - RESPECT!





Meeting Aduhi Chawngthu

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Me and Chhamanator were on our way to meet our blogger friend Aduhi who had come to Guwahati a few days back. We were on the bus which was about an hour drive to reach where she stayed. I asked Chhamanator, "Do you know where Aduhi lives, back in Mizoram?" He replied "Nope!". "Have you met her before?"  He said, "No, this will be my first time too." It's always exciting to meet someone for the first time, whom you have known (online) for quite some time. I started blogging three years ago, and I remember changing my blog layout quite often because I could not find the 'neat' template I wanted - a template which would reflect a 'Diary' since my blog is all about a disclosure of my diary. One day, while reading Aduhi's blog, I recognized she was using a new 'notepad-like' template, and it was exactly what I wanted. So I hunted something similar for myself, and that is how I got my 'now' template. I haven't changed it ever since. 

Pssst... This link leads to our first online interaction. Click THIS. :-)

I've been always impressed with the way she writes. She writes great stories too! She uses simple words, which I don't have to 'google' about, and it is easy to read, for a non-literature student and a non-book reader like myself. I'm not interested in reading books. Yup! That's why I love blogs. They are short and sweet. Way before I started to have my own blog, Aduhi's blog was one of the blogs I visited most, which I would find on the right side of a Mizo website misual.com put up by my cousin Sandman. I was not sure whether it would be impolite to just comment on a stranger's blog, so, many posts I read and left un-commented. But I guess I did the right thing when I started putting up my comments, she promptly commented on mine, and then, we added each other on Facebook, and then, we finally get to meet :-)

Our arrival was much delayed since we were caught up in traffic jam. We texted and called each other in between. While texting, I remember one of her blog post where she wrote about how she hated using short cut words in sms, so I kept in mind to use the correct words :-). I also remembered Sandman's post where he wrote about online friends. We don't know where they live nor their parents name or what their parents do, or their real names, but what we do know is their likes and dislikes, their favorite color, their birthdays, the kind of music they like, their opinion about the society or politics, and so on. That is whats exciting about meeting online friends. You don't know them, but you actually know them pretty well :D. 

Finally, we arrived. We shook hands and started to talk. You wouldn't believe how smooth the conversation went. There was nothing awkward about it. Seems as if we are long lost friends, who could finally meet after so many years. She said, "You're shorter than I expected". We all laughed. She must have thought I was having a supermodel figure or something :P. We took her to a restaurant nearby, where we had Mutton biryani. I guess we made a mistake on taking her to a North-East biryani shop, to a person who has come from the land of biryani itself (Hyderabad). It must not have been what she expected, but she ate without any complain. The best part was, I could actually talk and laugh to tears with her. It was fun.

I don't want to take credit for travelling more than an hour to meet her, because honestly, it was a day that my samples were to arrive from Mizoram. They've been sending it every week, so I had to go and collect it, and she happened to be in town, and Chhamanator was kind enough to come along. Since our campus is that far from the city, we don't usually go there, if not for church, or good food, or for shopping. But I would be lying if I say it was not worth to meet her. I'm glad we did. We bid goodbye, with lingering memories of the short meeting. The next meeting, we know not when. 

So, here's a toast to online world, to blogging and to the good friends it had brought me. 
Cheers!



Adree

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She calls me Mimi
I call her Adree
We both love Chicken Tandoori

She calls me monkey
I call her donkey
Yay we are both funky

She asks me why I'm sad
I tell her the reason why I'm mad
And she tries her best to make me glad

She reads books
I sing from hymnbooks
We both love great cooks

She asks me all kinds of questions with "Why"
I answer her "Because the sky so high"
Which makes us both smile

We may one day become scientists
I hope we don't end up being a stylist
At least we should achieve to be a cyclist

She wants me to mention her in my blog
So before she beats me with a log
I'm jotting down words prior to her morning jog

Hey Adree! I'm in a poetic mood
I'm sorry if this is not good
But I know I can still cheer you up with food


NB: Trying out a poem for my friend, who has been more or less like a mom to me, advising me and guiding me in all possible ways, but sometimes she's like a baby too :P

Happy birthday, in advance, my dear friend
I'm glad to have you in my life




Proud to be a Mizo

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When using the above picture as my Facebook cover photo (which was designed by my friend Samuel), it got many ‘Likes’. But one of my friends frankly commented “I don’t get this, is there something to be proud of, or even if I was British or American... I still won’t get it. It’s something which happened by accident of birth and not something we've achieved”. It got me thinking, she has a point there. What am I proud of?

When I was a little girl, I always thought I was less fortunate. Television made me see white skin colored girls, with all the good toys, blonde hairs and pretty smiles. They have clean city and good roads, beautiful houses and green lawns, they have washing machines and dish washers, they have yellow school buses, they get to wear anything they want in school, they have their own lockers, they have prom nights and campings, they have beaches and resorts, movie theatres and music schools, and if they can act or sing or play a game, they become millionaires by the time they turn sixteen. Well, that was what media and movies taught me about ‘Sap’ (the Western people). They seem to enjoy life so much. “Dear God, why wasn’t I born a Sap?” was my question many a times.

In Mizoram, our roads are small, rough and curvy. Our houses are one inch apart from our neighbors, the city is congested. It’s a better option to walk, because you’ll get stuck in traffic jams full of government vehicles trying to reach their offices situated within the city area. The internet speed becomes super slow, we don’t have Domino’s Pizza, KFC and big air-conditioned shopping malls, we don’t have good playgrounds for sportsmen, we have corrupted politicians, and when it rains, we get landslides. Majority of us are Christians, but we all don’t show a Christian lifestyle, there are murders and fights, thefts and prostitutions. The evilness of today’s world is slowly creeping in to our very young State, a State with a population of 10.91lakh, invading the innocent minds like any other people in the world.

In spite of all these, I’ve slowly come to realize the reason why I am proud. I’m proud of the fact that, even though so young a tribe, we have achieved so much. We rank 1st in literacy according to the Census of India report, and our HDI (Human Development Index) is marked High. Ours is the only state without homeless. This shows how much we are trying. We may not have the best resource or the best technology, but we have a social connection with each other, and humanity still exists in our soul. Last month, two young people got lost near a river, and it touched the hearts of the entire Mizo clan, and many of them set out to search for them. We have a quality called ‘Tlawmngaihna’, which doesn’t have an exact word in English, but may be close to ‘selfless service for others’. When someone dies, even if it is a person whom we don’t know, we are ready to stay up all night and mourn with the grieving family. When we found out that Mom had cancer, I couldn’t believe the many people who came and prayed for her, people that we haven’t even talked to in our lives. This is what we do, as a Mizo and as a Christian. They say that Tlawmngaihna is fading among the youths; well we have to make sure that it doesn’t, and I personally feel that it will not, because it is God’s special gift to us.

Our women, they are beautiful, ambitious and smart. They have good head on their shoulders. I’m proud of our men, even though so possessive and they sometimes come up with the not so appreciative comments to girls above 25 years saying “I in la young” when she puts on a dress, or has a new hair style, or rides a bicycle or gets adapted to new age music. I find it annoying (:P). Most of us girls complain about their “narrow mindedness” when it comes to interracial relationships and marriages, but if we give it a clear thought, they ought to be. Because they are born as “men” and it is their responsibility to preserve the race, a race having a population not even enough to open Shopper’s Stop and Movie theatres and eateries like Pizza Hut or Café Coffee Day, to earn profits. Yes, that is how less we are. And it hurts them to see their own girls being taken by an already well-established race. So, maybe we should cut them some slack.  After all, they may talk harsh, but do we really see them break legs and bones when their sister/daughter gets married to the love of her life? They slowly accept and bless, with an aching heart.

So, even though we may not have green lawns and beautiful houses, my Mizoram is still beautiful, because it looks green from top and it has beautiful people inside. Our roads may be rough and curvy, but our hearts are smooth and reliable. The government is doing its best to promote sports and education; I bet the coming generation will make us more proud, because things are getting developed. We will excel in arts and music, because we are good at it, we just need the right platform to exhibit our talents. Our school children look smart and tidy in their school uniforms. Our politicians do corrupt, but then, don’t all politicians do? Our houses may be one inch close to our neighbors, but we treat each other as families. Traffic jam? Yes, you can't escape that. But our drivers are polite and they don't honk the horns any time they like. We may not live up to the expected Christian lifestyle, but then again, nobody’s perfect. We may see landslides during monsoon, and at the same time it gives us a chance to see the many tlawmngai guys, ever willing to help one who gets stuck in the mud, or to clear the road. We may not have big shopping malls, but we have the latest of fashion in the world, and we have talented tailors who can stitch all the designs we need. Our shops may not have AC but the weather itself is air-conditioned. We may not have Hard Rock Cafe or McDonalds, but our taste buds only really gets satisfied with Mizo dishes like Sachek and Vawklubai and Sawhchiar.

Now, coming back to the photo comment, I guess being “Proud to be a Mizo” means being proud of who we are. God created us for a purpose and we are born for a reason. So whether you are born a Mizo, or a Bengali, or a Tamil, or an African, or American, or European, or even a cocktail of two races, just be proud of who you are. Being born this way may not be something we have achieved, but I have learned in my path of life, that people who are happy with who they are, are the most fortunate people, and that sure is something to be proud of.

As for me, I am Proud to be a Mizo :-) and I leave you with one of my favorite Mizo song

"Zam ngai lo Vala tang ta che, I ram leh hnam humhim nan"

















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